So, it turns out you have a crystal ball. We all do. Your friends, it turns out, and your entire social network have a tremendous influence on your future. We want bright futures. We want better living and it has been said that the most important tool at our disposal for living better is other people.
In the words of motivational speaker Jim Rohn: “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” You can argue the idea of being determined by outside sources rather than your own decisions shaping your destiny, but when you consider that adults in most circumstances have the liberty to choose their friends and circle of influence, it dissolves the idea that we are not personally responsible for our futures.
The people we surround ourselves with are the biggest influence on our behavior, attitudes, and results. We should point out that our “entire” social network includes online as well as offline. So then, if our best tool is at our disposal, how do we use it?
First, accept the truth that the people you spend the most time with shape who you are. They determine what conversations dominate your attention. They affect which attitudes and behaviors you are regularly exposed to. Eventually, you start to think like they think and behave like they behave. It’s a fact of life that some people hold us back, while others propel us forward.
Second, accept the truth that you can construct your own social network and that you are responsible. In most cases, we are not at the mercy of our family, our culture, our school, our community as to where and whom we choose to spend our precious time. Our guest in Season 1, Ryan Stream says, “if you want to change, you have to change your friends.” If we sit idly by, without taking deliberate action, we may suffer the result of an unintentional life of existing rather than thriving, reacting to rather than acting upon.
Third, make some decisions. There are 7.9 billion people on the planet and a plethora of internet forums to choose from. We not only must choose who to allow but who not to allow. Most of us are experiencing or have experienced negative people who are simply not good for us. The future we want won’t happen with these people around us. We are going to need to act with courage and diplomacy to make the necessary changes with our allotted time.
Fourth, we change, and other people change. Some good advice is to spend your time with the people who are already living the life you ultimately want to live–those who have been successful in your field or people that you really admire and aspire to emulate, then regularly look into your crystal ball, and evaluate your future and your entire social circle.
For those of us interested in horses, I recommend The Horsemanship Journey. The show showcases the best horsemen/women and personal improvement professionals of our time. It’s where horse people go for motivation, information, and inspiration. It’s the wisdom and knowledge of the best of the best. It’s excellence in horsemanship and in life from those who’ve achieved it. If your future self is more skilled and more knowledgeable with horses, The Horsemanship Journey is one of the places you’ll want to be. Surround yourself with greatness and be your best you!
Getting better outcomes for ourselves and for our horses The Pareto principle states that roughly 80% of consequences come from 20% of causes.
I was talking to my friend Jimmy Sharp. He was a mechanic that worked on my trucks and everything else that broke.